Brave New World

Tomorrow I jump into a brave new world. I will once again be a college student. I never thought I would write that sentence. When I quit school to become a full time homemaker eleven years ago, I thought that my life was laid out for me. In that moment, I was content in what I was doing. And I know now that it was the right decision for me at the time. I had no direction for a career or even the desire to have one. I had a child and a husband thrown in my lap and therefore a purpose, one I took on happily. So while all of my peers were doing the college thing and starting careers, I was raising a family. Now, while all of my peers are starting to raise a family, I am doing the college thing. It would seem I got it backwards. But is there really any forwards and backwards in life? Or is it all just a jumbled mess of figuring things out as you go? I lean toward the latter.

I had children very young and I knew I didn't want that to stop me from being the mom I wanted to be. Thankfully I had a partner who supported me in that decision. So I got to be at home when my kids were young. I got to be there for all of the first stages. I got to send them off to school and get them settled into that world. I've loved every minute of it. (Well, not every minute. Any mom will tell you there are minutes when you'd rather be banging your head against a wall than listen to anymore whining or clean up another mess.) Strike that; I've love almost every minute of it. But last year when they were all at school for most of the day, I found myself bored and wanting something more. I found myself ready for a new adventure. I thought through all of my options and realized I wanted to finish school so that I could find something new to love to do.

I'm focusing on Art History and hope to do museum work later. I find the whole thing at once daunting and exciting. The idea of taking tests brings about an instant gag reflex. But the idea of learning something new and interesting makes me really excited. This experience is bringing out my inner nerd.

Other than the stack of books on my bedroom floor, the kids probably won't notice much of a difference. I'll be in school while they are in school. Then we'll all come home and do homework together. I think it will be good for them to see me work for something. It's an opportunity to show them that there's never a point in life when you can't change what you're doing. We're ever changing and evolving people.

So here I am off to my brave new world, ready for a new adventure. That seems to be the theme of 2011 for our family. Just a jumbled mess. But if you allow yourself, there's some fun in the sorting.